kind of starting this on a whim!

but also kind of not really

☀☀☀

 I've really been struggling with my relationship to social media recently. If I spend hours scrolling, I feel guilty. I get anxious about what I post and when I post it, wondering who and what will see me, even though I have most of my accounts on private. It's a truly awful feeling that I loathe, but could never really put a name to it. Until I watched this video by Afrodizjha.

I highly encourage everyone to give it a watch. And subscribe to her channel because she makes some amazing videos about pop culture. 

Anyway, my current usage of social media is much less now compared to what it was a few months ago. It started with turning all the notifications off. Then I deleted the apps from my phone. I still have the accounts so I sometimes scroll on my laptop, but now I've kind of circled back to the same amount of usage just not on my phone.

The reason for this, I think, is that I still have some kind of reason to be on these platforms. Whether it's my attempt at a bookstagram (@maomi_in_the_margins), family, friends, or my friends cats, because I have a reason, I will continue to go back. And then these little check-ins become big slides into doomscrolling. Then I feel guilty and try to cut back but then I want to check in and the cycle repeats itself over and over and over and-

I figured I would give myself a space that's focused on what I want. Something I can engage with intentionally. Without the distraction and the siren song of doomscrolling calling my name.

That lands us here.

I'll be posting mostly reading/book stuff on this blog! Maybe I'll post about knitting too. Really it can be whatever I want it to be about, but starting small will help with consistency.

If you've found yourself here at the end of this first post, thanks for sticking around! I appreciate you spending your time here. And maybe it'll encourage you, dear reader, to scroll a little less. Good luck out there!

🐾 maomi